It’s been discussed before, and will probably come up again…
Truth be told, this issue is constant in the average family and seems to manifest itself in many forms and versions.
It’s become a ‘given’… We relate to it as an inseparable part of raising children. Parents expect it, and are occupied with either preventing or setting it right.
There’s gotta be a better way…
The better way begins with a new insight on how this evolved.
What about ‘brotherly love?’
Indeed, it was once assumed that brothers (and sisters) have a natural affinity towards each other.
Here’s the thing.
In modern western culture the child is placed in the center. All revolves around him/her to assure his/her ongoing contentment.
Technically, this might be doable (though not recommended) in a family where there is an only child.
However, in the average family where there are additional children, the plot thickens…
There’s only room for one in the center. If someone else enters, it gets crowded … and so begins the competition/rivalry for the coveted place in the ‘center’. End of ‘brotherly love…’
Now for the ‘better way’ – the natural way.
We can rectify this dynamic by restructuring the constellation where everything revolves around the child. How to restructure?
Quite simply. Getting back to the natural family structure, the one where parents lead and children intrinsically follow.
Achieving that begins first and foremost in the parent’s mindset, by adhering to the proper role that was divinely intended for the parents as leaders, and expecting the children to follow. It’s instinctive, even in the animal kingdom. Clearly, humans can adopt that format as well.
Ironically, everything revolving around children hasn’t really made children any happier (usually just more demanding), and certainly hasn’t given parents the status and peace of mind that they deserve.
The mindset of not feeling undermined and confidently maintaining the status as leader in the family can go a long way. Yes, it can even change the dynamics of sibling interaction.
Try it, and don’t be surprised when it happens. It’s only natural!
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